“You won’t be able to achieve anything if you choose to study AB Journalism.”
You know what? I’m not even surprised to hear that again from you. :) I’ll admit that your words had managed to inflict damage into my core, the disappointment in your voice circulated inside my mind, almost taking all the faith left in my system.
As a child, I dreamt of becoming a nurse or a doctor. It must have been the result of being in and out of the hospital half of my life. And part of the reason was you. It’s what you wanted for me, right?
But as I get older, I saw and understand more of the world I stepped foot on. One night, you asked me what course I would like to pursue in college. I told you I aimed to be a preschool teacher. And do you remember what your reaction was? You laughed. The mirth was evident, as if my answer was too amusing for your ears. And you began your lecture about all those promising careers and profession that will guarantee a successful future; an assuring path.
Remember the first time you told me that I wouldn’t get far with the choices I made? I was young then, but in your perspective I was never too young to understand your intentions. And that’s mostly true. I perfectly understand the meaning of your actions and even the things you failed to do.
I know you wanted the best for me. But what if the best for you isn’t the best for me? What if my happiness and desires are at stake? Can you, for once, understand my dreams and the person I aspire to be? Or is it my responsibility to do anything to please you?
I don’t know what I did to deserve such trust. It’s as if you innately believe that I can achieve anything with the knowledge I own. I’m sorry but I can’t. I may be bright, but never the smartest. I’m sorry for letting you down again.
I’ve live my life as someone who always thought that she’d done her hardest to make you proud. But in my opinion, I still haven’t tried that much. I haven’t even released my full potential, the very best of what I can give. But I will. For you and for myself. Wait and you’ll see.
I will make it and you will be proud of me.